Blazing Angels: Squadrons of WWII - PS3 Review

Blazing Angels: Squadrons of WWII
Published by Ubisoft

Reviewed by Matt Adcock

Arrgghhh – they’re all over me!! Multiple bogeys – every which way I turn, I’m pretty torn up and I don’t think I can shake ‘em… Maybe if I lead them in a suicidal dive through a heavy barrage of anti air flak? – To quote Han Solo “They’d have to be mad to follow”… With a swift tilt of the Sixaxis I’m barrel rolling into the cloud of AA fire, my machine guns blazing – enemy fighters are dropping left and right – for the first time I begin to allow myself to think that I might just make it...
Welcome to the Second World War’s Battle of Britain – from the inside of the cockpit! Yes Blazing Angels is a PS3 port of a game that has been available for over a year on Xbox 360 and PC, but that doesn’t stop it being an absolute blast to play (and they have thrown in extra content like 10 extra planes, a couple of extra missions, a new (exclusive) multiplayer mode, and the ability to fly your plane with the Sixaxis tilt controls).

This is your chance to pilot 50 authentic World War II aircraft, from the P-51 Mustang to the redoubtable Spitfire – it has an agreeable arcade style of game play that you can pick up in seconds but may find hard to put down as this version is blessed with a lot of ‘just one more go’ factor… Graphically the PS3 incarnation is the best yet – although being a port the developers haven’t bothered to sort out the occasional frame rate drops which are annoying when you notice them.
Flying by tilting the PS3 controller is a funky way to rule the skies and works better than I thought it would, the Sixaxis controller definitely needs to have rumble put back in for version 2 – Come on Sony, get these on the market ASAP!! - but if they keep making the most of motion sensitive game elements (flOw and Super Rub-a-dub are other great examples) then the ‘This is living’ claim of the PS3 marketing machine is starting to be an accurate description of innovative game design…
Single player bombing, torpedoing and dog fighting missions get progressively harder and the sense of team play in multiplayer (16 at once) aerial dogfights is great – although if they’re working on Blazing Angels 3: Supersonic Air Superiority it would be nice to have voice chat included too.

Overall this is a slick, solid game that will delight plane fans, and sits nicely alongside the awesome ground based Resistance: Fall of Man – the PS3 might be outnumbered world wide by Xbox 360 at a ratio of 3:1 but if it keeps on improving games made on the rival machine alongside adding it’s own unique exclusives, Microsoft should be looking over their shoulders and barrel rolling!!

Darkmatters rating system (out of 5):

ööö1/2 (chocs away!!)

Darkmatters: H O M E

The Woods 2 - review

The Woods 2 (TBC)
Dir. Paul Wade

Reviewed by Matt Adcock

'The Woods' was a little known cult Brit horror film of the lowest possible budget variety- made by a renegade production company known only as ‘Wade Bros Productions’…

It was a messy, amateur effort - pretty poor to be honest - but it did have grains of potential and the mysterious Wade Bros obviously felt there was still a lot more to explore with the mythology they created (and when I say created I obviously mean ‘ripped off’) with their strange woods phenomenon.
And so, as is often the case, a sequel has been made...

Here's the plot synopsis (from the Editor and Star Tom Wade’s Blog): “After being chased, mauled and left for dead in the 1st terrifying 'Woods,' the drifter (Simon Wade) now takes up the mantle of 'The Woodsman.' Along with fellow Woodsmen (Paul and Dylan Wade) they rage terror like never witnessed before on innocents who happen to stray in their path. Following the death of his brother and pet dog at the hands of such creatures, special agent Mack Power (Tom Wade) sets off to confront the creatures one last time...”So I hastily seeked out the 2nd film in the potential money spinning franchise which is 'The Woods'.

Man, The Woods 2 is not just a bigger, nastier, louder and longer version, this is like Evil Dead 2 and 3 blended together – just with more half naked Wade brothers running about the woods than malevolent evil dead… But hopefully you get the idea!? Everything is a step up from the first movie – not least the levels of violence, nudity and erm, running through the woods…

Poster quote:
“The Woods 2 is the sickest, most disturbing movie I’ve seen in the last half an hour…” Matt Adcock – Darkmatters

Darkmatters rating system (out of 5):
Action ööö – half naked hill billies run amok
Laughs öööö – I found it hilarious but that might just be my sense of humour!
Horror ööö – graphic it ain't, but the implied mutilation is certainly unsettling
Babes ö – I don’t fancy any of the cast members…

Overall ööö1/2 (horror fans should seek this out on YOU TUBE)

Or find it here: Tomwade.blogspot.com


"they don't call this guy 'special' agent Mack Power for nothing...

- he has special needs... and a gun!"

Darkmatters: H O M E...

I Stare INTO OBLIVION - Funeral For A Friend are back!!

Into Oblivion - Funeral For A Friend...

Don't think they're singing about the new stunning PS3 version of the massive RPG but the new track is awesome!!

Into Oblivion (Reunion) is released on 07 May... very very cool.



"F4AF's new track - as sexy as the long lost Anna F..."

Blades of Glory - review

Blades of Glory (12a)
Dir. Martin Weisz

Reviewed by Matt Adcock

An expectant hush falls as the skaters take to the ice, the results of their years of hard training are about to be presented – everything rests on the next few minutes, can they bring home glory or are they destined to fail in front of millions?Blades of Glory starts well, there’s a good triple axle of funny back-stories involving a blonde orphan who was born to skate and looks a lot like my mate Tom, this Jimmy MacElroy (played by Jon ‘Napoleon Dynamite’ Heder) is an effeminate skating prodigy who loves the sequins and figure hugging outfits. He’s up against the red blooded, sex addicted ‘Tsunami of Swagger’ Chazz Michael Michaels embodied by Will Ferrell who prides himself in taking ice based pelvic thrusting to previously unexplored levels. Things get messy when both are handed lifetime bans from the sport following a joint gold medal-wining stand off which ends in the rivals shamefully brawling on the ice.
A few harsh years in the wilderness i.e. with no competitive skating leaves them broken and even dents the faith of MacElroy’s scene stealing stalker Hector (Nick Swardson). Then an unexpected bolt from the blue sees the two rivals thrown a skating lifeline in a loophole which will allow them to compete again – as partners - the first national level boy / boy ice dancing duo.
Cue every ‘crotch to face’ joke you can think of as the macho and over sexed Michaels is forced to dance with MacElroy, the shockwaves sent out from their joint lycra clad entrance even causes the professional commentator to remark: "As if skating isn’t gay enough?"
Throw in a comedy decapitation, some impressively comic ice-dance routines and plenty of very funny dialogue like when the two rivals meet again after their enforced break and MacElroy says: “I see you got fat!” Michaels replies: “I see you still look like a 15-year-old girl - but not hot!”
Blades of Glory takes a solid 5.8 (out of 6) from the judges due to its eagerness to make the audience laugh. Yes it’s seriously stupid stuff but sometimes that can be just the ticket for anyone seeking fun night out and the whole cast certainly go at the lightweight material with unrestrained gusto. The pals I saw this with laughed loud and long – so it’s safe to report that Blades of Glory achieves its mission to entertain.

Darkmatters rating system (out of 5):

Action ööö – keeps moving
Laughs öööö – laugh out loud funny!!
Horror öö – multiple scenes of disturbing crotch to face
Babes öö – only average eye candy

Overall ööö1/2 (eat my ice...)

Darkmatters: H O M E

PS3 flOw, rub dub, blast factor ...Gaming Heaven

"PS3 female warrior... who looks a bit like my wife - fancies a game of Virtua Tennis 3!"


"Freaky fun for the whole family (of aquatic microbe munching snakes)..."

Downloaded flOw, Blast Factor and Super Rub-a-Dub this weekend from PlayStation Store - wow, very addictive stuff!! Add a Virtua Tennis 3 purchase and mix for a family friendly Easter Weekend of PS3 mayhem...

Get your juices 'flOwing' Check this out:
http://www.jenovachen.com/flowingames/flowtheory.htm

Hypnotic, entrancing and altogether gorgeous... playing flOw is awesome and not unlike being tripped out on endorphins.


"Duck or Shark... is it so wrong that I prefer the bonus shark levels where you get eat the ducklings!?"

Super Rub-a-Dub is summed up excellently by Pro-G:

"What adds longevity and excitement to what would otherwise be a fairly short-lived novelty is the instant world ranking you receive on finishing each individual stage. Returning immediately to a level to shave a few tenths-of-a-second off your time, or to gather just one or two more ducklings, is irresistible, when it means you might jump hundreds of places up the leaderboard to the top-100, or even make the best ten scores in the world."

Darkmatters rating system (out of 5):

Super Rub-a-Dub: öööö

Blast Factor: ööö

flOw: öööö

Virtua Tennis 3: öööö

Darkmatters: H O M E

Transformers - the movie - prepare to geek out!!

As Optimus Prime says in the stunning looking trailer:

"Freedom is the right of all sentient beings."

See it for yourself here: http://www.transformersmovie.com/main.html

NICE!!

The Hills Have Eyes 2 - review

The Hills Have Eyes 2
Dir. Martin Weisz

Reviewed by Matt Adcock

Gang of mutant hillbillies – check
Unfeasibly good looking squad of trainee U.S. Marines – check
This can mean only one thing… A squelchy sequel to last year's remake of Wes Craven's 1977 exploitation classic has been found crawling into cinemas. It ignores the original movies’ sequel and replaces it with a ‘marines versus cannibals’ second rate version of ALIENS…

This is basically the whimsical and genteel tale of a search and exercise in New Mexico's Section 16 (you know, the one where nuclear testing produced a freakish mutant family who like nothing better then hunting, killing and eating anyone who crosses their path). It’s not remotely whimsical or genteel – in fact The Hills Have Eyes 2 is a brutal gut punch of primal fear and crunching violence, backed up with copious gore and some very unpleasant rape scenes… Quite why you’d want to watch this sort of thing for fun is a point for debate with your psychologist alone – but if limb severing, intestine spilling, brain bashing action is what you’ve a hankering for, this delivers buckets of slightly stale smelling blood.

I’d be lying if I told you that this is an admirable piece of cinema, The Hills Have Eyes 2 takes what could have been a cool fight to the death plotline and wastes it with pointless ‘pick em off one by one’ by the numbers – seen it a million times before - effort. The only good thing about it is new hottie Jessica Stroup (a model who looks laughably out of place in combat fatigues) – she lights up the screen and should find better films to show off her cute ass in, in future… But even she isn't as hot as last year's eye candy (Emile De Raven).
Last year Alexandre Aja did a decent job of remaking the original Hills Have Eyes but his efforts are wasted and watered down by this poor follow up.
The Lucky ones die fast – unfortunately the audience are not so lucky… If by some miracle they decide to knock out another decomposing animated corpse sequel – they would do well to just pretend that this one never happened… Average horror films are legion and this is just another severed head to toss on the pile…

Darkmatters rating system (out of 5):

Action ööö - some by the numbers stuff
Laughs öö – one really nice bit where a mutant chops of a soldier's hand and waves to him with it as he falls to his death
Horror öööö – graphic and nasty but not very good
Babes ööö – Jessica Stroup is hot - even covered in mud and blood

Overall öö (hardly worth the effort)


"you know of course, blondes like me are much too cute to suffer too much... you brunettes though - you're in for a very bad time!!"


"line up - that's right, we're ready to be picked off from left to right!"

Darkmatters: H O M E

Matt's PS3 is Saving Mankind (when not playing MotorStorm)

"Stick, no, twist, no erm ... Fold"

Folding@Home on the PS3

Since 2000, Folding@Home (FAH) has led to a major jump in the capabilities of molecular simulation. By joining together hundreds of thousands of PCs throughout the world, calculations which were previously considered impossible have now become routine. FAH has targeted the study of of protein folding and protein folding disease, and numerous scientific advances have come from the project.
Now there has been another major advance in capabilities. This advance utilizes the new Cell processor in Sony’s PLAYSTATION 3 (PS3) to achieve performance previously only possible on supercomputers. With this new technology, we will likely be able to attain performance on the 20 gigaflop scale per computer. The goal is to apply this new technology to push Folding@Home into a new level of capabilities, applying the simulations to further study of protein folding and related diseases, including Alzheimer’s Disease, Huntington's Disease, and certain forms of cancer. With these computational advances, coupled with new simulation methodologies to harness the new techniques, we will be able to address questions previously considered impossible to tackle computationally, and make even greater impacts on our knowledge of folding and folding related diseases.

"so... that's the erm, thingy..."

"below is a complete babe... who knows, maybe my PS3 wil save her life one day?"

Darkmatters: H O M E

PS3 sales take UK by storm - this is living!!

PS3 becomes the UK's “fastest-selling home console ever over its debut weekend”…

Today’s reading is from the epistle of St. Orm (first name Mo Tor)

“And verily some did doubt that SONY could perform a PAL miracle with their delayed and ‘too expensive’ console… Others had already wandered from the true gaming path and turned to the lesser gods of the uber geek Micro- soft in vain hope to experience the blessed nirvana of next generation…
However there were yet a number who kept the faith and this fiery bunch of game lovers didst show the rest of the world that the UK chooseth the PS3 in larger than expected numbers helping it to destroy the opening weekend sales figures for a home console by selling 165,000 units and almost 300,000 games - attach rate is 1.65.” (Data from ChartTrack).

Looks like resistance is futile as Sony sell three quarters of their total 220,000 UK launch stock for day one, setting a new record even at their buttock clenchingly high price point.

Domination:

PS3’s record-breaking debut for a home console comfortably beats the previous top seller Nintendo Wii, which sold 105,000 in its launch weekend in December last year. And is more than double the sales of rival Xbox which sold in the region of 70,000 at launch in December 2005.

This is an awesome achievement for Sony, especially without the ‘Christmas pester power factor’ which as a parent I experience each year.

So the next generation console battle is well and truly joined in the UK – the software charts bear testament to the coming of a new power with Resistance: Fall of Man in at number 1 and MotorStorm following close behind at 2. Other PS3 exclusives Ridge Racer 7, Virtua Fighter 5 and Genji: Days of the Blade all made the top 20 as well in 11th, 14th and 16th respectively…

How the market will look in 12 months time will be fascinating to behold but as they say “do not underestimate the power of PlayStation”

Links:

PS3 initial reaction / review

MotorStorm Review

Darkmatters: H O M E

The PS3 has landed - and it's lovely!!

"Kikizo... nice site, nice images of PS3"

PS3 IT'S HERE...

So after having spent a weekend with the shiny PS3 – here’s my initial review…

Arrival:
The Royal Mail delivery guy was only slightly freaked when I ran out of my house and hugged him after spying him unloading a PS3 sized box from the back of his van on Friday (launch day in the UK). He was on a special PS3 delivery run and said that he’s made a lot of people happy that morning!! I took that to mean that he'd dropped off their PS3s not 'pleasured' them in any other ways but I guess you never know!?

I unpacked the console which is big, curved, heavy and sparkling in the mid morning sunlight thanks to its super gloss finish… The PS2 was unceremoniously decamped from under the TV and put to one side, the PS3 took its place, leads were connected and log in details logged. It took about 5 – 10 mins to get everything sorted including the obligatory download of the 1.6 operating system (which enables background downloads, additional PS2 compatibility etc).

Online:
I have a broadband wireless signal and the PS3 picked it up no problem – next stop was the Playstation Store where I set up an account and was soon downloading Gran Turismo HD, F1 Championship demo and the ‘Grenade’ cinema advert (all free content). Later I returned and bought two full games - Tekken 5 and Blast Factor which set me back about a tenner for the two.
Everything was smooth sailing registering even if I dropped signal a couple of times and I grinned when a bonus confirmation of a free ‘thank you’ copy of Casino Royale Blu-ray flashed across the screen. In order to address the signal drop issue I found that moving the PS3 slightly on the shelf I found a much sweeter / stronger spot for the wi-fi signal (it jumped from 30% to 67% strength and hasn’t dropped since).

The Pad:
The Sixaxis pad is lighter than the PS2 Dualshock and I was glad that I’d bought a second one (plus charging dock so can charge both controllers at the same time). Yes it misses the rumble – and I’ll certainly replace these with rumble enabled pads when they become available – but the new trigger shaped L2 / R2 bottons are very nice. The motion sensitiveness take a bit of getting used to – I have mastered it on Tiger Woods PGA ’07 to put spin on the ball but can’t really get on with it in MotorStorm where it feels ‘tacked on’ and unnecessary (but is defaulted to ‘off’ anyway).
Using the Sixaxis to play Fifa ’07 (PS2) was fun – the novelty of not being wire connected to the machine is a real delight and changes the way you play. Would be superb if EA could map a ‘dive’ / ‘push’ / ‘header’ function to the motion sensor for Fifa ’08!?

The Games:
There’s a good reason why Resistance and MotorStorm are top of the sales chart this week – they are both excellent games. Read my full MotorStorm review: MotorStorm - racing has never been so good. In a word though it’s great and showcases the PS3 off to the max. Plus it will have regular additional content to download in the months ahead… If you only pick one game, I’d make it MotorStorm!

Resistance is a rock solid FPS with a nicely sci-fi infused plotline and great damage physics engine. It engaged me enough to want to play through the single player story and the first few levels break you in hard – this is not an easy in rails shooter, you’ll need to think and react to constantly changing situations from the start. Graphically it’s very nice with a mature, restrained hew and a nice balance of reward for progression, plus some great ‘WTF’ moments when the alien enemies surprise you either with impressive set pieces or a deft bit of A.I. tricksiness. The online multiplayer is an absolute blast too, massive scale death matches and team games… Will be playing this for a long while yet!!

Tiger Woods PGA ’07 is a solid update of the game – lots of options and killer graphics. Big jump over the PS2 version if you like your grass to sway and your golfer to grimace as he watches your shot dropping into a water hazard (the water is superb to look at but you really don’t want to be going near it in this game if you can help it!).

The downloaded Tekken 5: Dark Resurrection delivered a top notch fighting experience with very nice graphics and Blast Factor is a fun erm, blaster where you use one analogue stick to move and the other to fire.

Have got other games planned to play but not enough hours in the day… On my shelf are the PS3 versions of The Godfather, Blazing Angels and Need for Speed: Carbon which are the fruits of trading in a load of PS2 / PSP games... More on those games soon…


DVDs:
I took a gaming timeout to watch Man Dancin’ (15) on DVD - haven’t had chance to grab a Blu-ray film yet but will probably invest in Mission Impossible III this week. This 'gangster returning home' tale is distinctly offbeat – but it looked and sounded fantastic. I was impressed with the number of options available e.g. picture cleaning and colour saturation which my current DVD doesn’t offer. In fact although I wasn’t planning to use the PS3 for my normal DVD playback as a rule, it did such a great job with this cool Scottish thriller that it may become the platform of choice.

Other Media:
So far I’ve only had time to load up and few music tracks and photos – but it’s a very simple operation either directly from memory card or via USB from digital camera / PSP. Am looking forward to trying out the remote access with my PSP and streaming content at some point. Surfing the www on the TV is fun and easy even without a keyboard.

Overall :
I’m a very happy customer… It’s been a long slow wait for the PS3 over here but from the initial experience it has been worth it!!
Pros – Next Gen graphics, strong initial game line up, unbelievably fun online (Resistance and MotorStorm in particular), easy to use Playstation store with some great content (Gran Turismo HD, Tekken 5, game demos etc), motion sensitive wirless controllers, very crisp feature laden DVD playback.

Cons – Expensive (shopkeeper in independent game shop I was in yesterday said that most of his PS3 sales had seen people trading in their 360s and / or PS2s to off set the cost, no Next Gen football games yet, Lack of rumble in pads at the moment is sad.

Darkmatters: H O M E

MotorStorm PS3 Review - Racing has never been so good

"A Storm is coming... MOTORSTORM!!"

MotorStorm PS3 (12+)

Reviewed by Matt Adcock

Every console should have a least one 5 star, AAA game to inspire legend and make people really want it but few ever have one to launch with… The Playstation 3 however, well it might just have got one for its Euro launch in the mud splattered shape of the ultimate off road racer MotorStorm!!
MotorStorm is an awesome experience – it taps into the ‘pure gaming spirit’ that has previously manifested itself in the original WipeOut on PS1, Grand Theft Auto III on PS2, Halo on Xbox and Zelda on the Gamecube… It’s a zeitgeist – a phenomenon - it’s a portal to utter gaming pleasure that even the most ardent fanboy from other platforms cannot help but deep down admit that they’d love it to be theirs.
I took the day off work in order to set and experience the PS3, it didn’t take long to set it up, fire it up and get online – after a preliminary browse of the Playstation Store (and a quick download of Gran Turismo HD for free) I began working my way through the launch games that I’d picked – Resistance Fall Of Man was first up, more on that later but first impressions were good. Next came Tiger Woods ’07 which was all that could have been expected of a next generation version, then came the moment which I had probably been pleasure delaying subliminally…

MotorStorm…

Nothing could have prepared me for what happened next.

The opening voice over and movie sets the tone for an epic and the game itself does not disappoint. Sure it takes a few games to find your bearings but before you realise it you’re living the MotorStorm and the adrenalin is pumping through your veins. Nothing else matters, you work your way through the various vehicle options – from the light and frisky motorbikes and quads, through the rally cars and trucks, up to the ground tearing big rigs…

Welcome to MotorStorm, the world's most brutal off-road racing event where the goal is to win at all costs. Survival is the priority, real-time deforming terrain sprays in all directions… The course literally gets torn up with each passing vehicle, causing every lap to be different. You’ll marvel at the advanced particle effects as the debris splatters each vehicle – the crashes are spectacular, burning wreckage never looked so good!! I’m talking Hollywood-style crash sequences that set new standards for game visuals. Then take the race online for some of the most intense head-to-head off-road racing you’ll witness (at least until the additional content comes online in a month or so and keeps coming until MotorStorm 2 rewrites the rules again... I can’t really find words for the feeling off pulling up level with the leader – in this case a self branded Australian, landing a clean punch which knocks him sprawling from the his ride off a 700 foot drop and burning ahead to win the race… Even if you’re not online you can witness the A.I opponents simulating human traits, like showing off, attacking, taunting, and doing whatever it takes to win. A nice change from the ‘on rails’ dubious A.I. that has plagued so many racing games up until now!

Yes the PS3 is expensive, it’s late and it’s got a big lead to overhaul from the 360 and Wii but if MotorStorm is any indication of the exclusive material that PS3 owners can look forward to (and Little Big Planet, Killzone 2, Ratchet & Clank are fast approaching), I am absolutely delighted to have witnessed the future of racing… If you’ve ever enjoyed a racing game, you owe it to yourself to spend some hours in the company of the mind wrecking, motor carnage of MotorStorm which is unmatched on any platform.

'ThreeSpeach' is reporting that a time trail mode will soon be made available: "PS3 owners who play MotorStorm online will receive a new 'Time Trial Mode' automatically – you won’t even need to download this one from the PLAYSTATION Store. Take any vehicle out on the track of your choice and go hell for leather to lay down the quickest lap time. You can race against ghost vehicles of your previous efforts, other players’ times and the best attempts from the MotorStorm development team – and then upload your best times to the global online rankings. In addition, more tracks, vehicles and game modes will be available later in the month, and thereafter on a regular basis... " NICE!!

Darkmatters rating system (out of 5):

Overall öööö1/2 (have never witnessed racing action as good!)

"Vrrooommm... speed blur insanity - love it!"


"Time to get a new motor perhaps!?"

Other reviews:

GameSpy
3/16/2007
4 out of 5
80.0%

GameSpot
3/5/2007
7.9 out of 10
79.0%

IGN
4/1/2007
8 out of 10
80.0%

Worth Playing
3/18/2007
8.5 out of 10
85.0%

Yahoo! Games
3/6/2007
4.5 out of 5
90.0%

Darkmatters: H O M E

Meet the Robinsons - review

Meet the Robinsons (U)
Dir. Stephen J. Anderson

Reviewed by Matt Adcock

So Disney fire their first big animated blockbuster of the year into cinemas this week with just a little production help from John ‘Cars’ Lasseter. It is the story of Lewis, a brilliant young orphan who has a passion for creating weird and wonderful inventions. His latest however a Memory Scanner, which he knocked up to help him find his lost birth mother (so they can become a family in true Disney style) gets him into all sorts of bother. And when I say ‘all sorts of bother’ I mean close encounters with evil mind controlling robotic bowler hats, a hungry but none too bright dinosaur and possibly the most dysfunctional future family ever…
Meet the Robinsons blazes a fun sci-fi comedy vibe that will please adults and children alike – my two sons (aged 6 and 9) were entranced and pronounced it to be ‘very cool’ and ‘absolutely awesome’ respectively. My mate Tim laughed loud and long too – especially at the more ‘off the wall’ moments such as a fun cameo photo of Tom Selleck and various oddball family members whose antics sailed over the heads of the kids.
The plot takes in many sci-fi references from Back to the Future to The Matrix and mixes a deftly wonderful combination that succeeds in both its comedy and obligatory Disney ‘lump in throat’ climax. You’ll certainly laugh – especially at scenes such as when uber bad guy demands of his T-Rex “Why aren't you seizing the boy?!” (Lewis is trapped in the corner). The dino replies after banging his head against the wall several times: “Because I have a big head and little arms… I'm just not sure how well this plan was thought through.”
It all zips along with pleasing pizzazz, limiting the musical numbers to a funky swing effort by and bunch of genetically enhanced mobster frogs – yes you did read that right!? I didn’t know what to expect from Meet the Robinsons having not read the book it is based on but I came away very pleased having witnessed the high jinks on offer here.
If you enjoyed The Incredibles, this will give you a similar buzz of feel good future action and comedy adventure. Hats off to Disney for delivering the first must see all age time travelling spectacular of the year!

Darkmatters rating system (out of 5):

Action ööö - family friendly comic action
Laughs öööö – very funny- quality stuff
Horror ö – mild tension
Babes ö – nothing animatedly sexy

Overall öööö (highly watchable fun)

"sit and stay... good boy!"

Darkmatters: H O M E

Kelly Craig - 300's hot secret weapon

"Photographic evidence that she really is 'smokin hot'!"

300 - what a film eh? I'm still high from its blood soaked overdose of glory... But one of the many great things in the film was the inclusion of Kelly Craig as the 'Oracle Girl'... Her sexy dance (which was filmed underwater by the way) was absolutely captivating, I tip the foxy model from Canada to go on to greater things movie wise after this...

Here are a couple more of her modelling shots...


"you don't need to be a mystic oracle to appreciate natural good looks"

"Um, miss Craig I think your trousers are falling down..."

Related links:

Click here to read My 300 Review

Leighton Meester (another movie / TV babe...) see her here

Katrina Bowden (" " " ") see her here

Darkmatters: H O M E

Sunshine - review

Sunshine (15)
Dir. Danny Boyle

Reviewed by Matt Adcock


…Incoming message from 1.2 lightyears out…
For years now we have stumbled in the darkness of a drought, an abyss, a cold hard vacuum of quality space based science fiction (apart from Serenity obviously).
But there is something bright on the horizon, a burning beautiful ball of light that promises to scorch away the rancid memories of Red Planet and Mission to Mars…

With a spirit of burgeoning optimism it was that I walked into the brilliant brightness of Sunshine and let it burn its memorable imprint into my retinas.

Sunshine by Danny ‘Trainspotting’ Boyle is based on an original screenplay by Alex ‘The Beach’ Garland and at first glance it might make you think of 2001: A Space Odyssey only on a more nihilistic and altogether darker vibe. It seems you see that in just fifty or so years our sun will die out and the future of humanity will rely on a select group of astronauts and scientists packed aboard a spaceship named ‘Icarus 2’ armed only with a giant deflector shield and a huge bomb – a bomb designed to reignite our nearest star. So we get to travel with the mix n match crew as they trace the same path of the ‘missing presumed dead Icarus 1’ that disappeared without trace some years before whilst also attempting to plant a bomb on our dying sun.

So far, so Armageddon 2, but Sunshine actually has far more in common with the classic Alien for ‘feel’ and not just because they pick up something rather malevolent en route… But it might just be their battle with the sheer tedium of being trapped in a cabin fever inducing spaceship for months on end that is their undoing… Or then again could there another influence altogether that will undoes their vital mission – it’s gripping stuff that walks the line between pondering mental anguish (otherwise known as Solaris) and kick ass crisis action (echoes of Boyle’s own 28 Days Later).

The Icarus II spaceship is a cool, iconic design and comes handily equipped with plentiful sci-fi cliché specials – tactically placed air locks, an on board AI that might have a mind of its own and of course miles of claustrophobic corridors in which to run, scream, fight and go mental.
The special effects rock too and deserve to be witnessed on the big screen, Sunshine really delivers on all fronts and
Cillian Murphy is worthy of special praise for his perfectly weighted performance.
…Message ends…

Darkmatters rating system (out of 5):

Action öööö - serious sci-fi thrills
Laughs öö – some but limited dark humour
Horror ööö – Boyle has good form for grimness
Babes öö – not what this is all about

Overall öööö (impressive)



"knock knock... who's there? The DARKNESS OF SPACE!!"

Darkmatters: H O M E

300 - review

"no not the Biblical Gideon and his 300 warriors... these guys are SPARTAN"


"freestyle cliff diving - was big in ancient Sparta"

300 (15)
Dir. Zack Snyder

Reviewed by Matt Adcock

I am a Spartan, descended from Hercules himself. Taught never to surrender and that death on the battlefield is the greatest glory in life (although film reviewing is obviously a close second)…
Now come and witness Sparta’s finest hour – the battle of Thermopylae in 480 B.C. where 300 Spartan warriors stood against the combined might of over a million aggressors. 300 is an unbelievable achievement, director Zack ‘Dawn of the Dead’ Snyder has brought to vivid, blood soaked life the crunching graphic novel by Frank ‘Sin City’ Miller. It’s powerful, full on macho stuff too, which has battle action that makes Gladiator, Braveheart and Lord of the Rings look positively tame in comparison. 300 is a film that unleashes the inner ‘wild at heart’ warrior in the viewer. If you’ve ever longed to stand by your principles and not be cowed, or just can’t take another day of having your soul sapped by the dreariness of everyday life – choose 300 and learn how from the greatest warriors who ever lived.

If the heroic tale of King Leonidas (Gerard Butler), who took on the self proclaimed ‘god king’ Xerxes and his millions of invading Persians with nothing more than his personal bodyguard of 300 blokes doesn’t move you, it’s time to check for a pulse. This is a guy who sacrifices everything to make a stand for freedom and was empowered to do so by his gorgeous wife Gorgo (Lena Headey). Gorgo not only willingly releases her king to certain death but also takes drastic measures on the home front to fight the insidious political traitors too.

Leonidas really sets the standard for noble warrior Kings and his stand against such insurmountable odds reverberates through history. His father’s heart of love for his family, his men and his country is moving to behold and the few potent moments when limbs are not being cleaved off really struck me.

300 is also the most visually spectacular film I’ve ever witnessed – every frame is a heavily stylised moving enhancement of the original graphic masterpiece. Battle may never look this good again but if total carnage leaves you cold then this really isn’t the film for you. If honour, excitement and entertainment beyond the thresholds of normal cinema is what you seek, there is nothing that can touch this bloody epic.

Enjoy it and then go and see it in IMAX too if you can!!

Darkmatters rating system (out of 5):

Action ööööö - unsurpassed battle glory
Laughs ööö – wry wit and dark humour
Horror ööö – plenty of blood soaked grimness
Babes öööö – Kelly Criag is a total babe!!

Overall ööööö (see it, love it, see it again!!)



"See a graphic novel come to life!!"


"feel the heat of battle!"

"Kelly 'how hot am I?' Craig in her show stopping Oracle dance"

See more of Kelly Craig here: Kelly Craig 300s Secret Weapon

Darkmatters: H O M E

Venom attacks - Spiderman 3

"The darkness consumes a new victim..."

"Prepare for a cool big screen showdown!!"

Darkmatters: H O M E

Factory Girl - review

Factory Girl (15)
Dir. George Hickenlooper

Reviewed by Matt Adcock

If and only if the thought of watching breath-taking action involving heroically muscled men in skimpy outfits and red cloaks battling insane odds leave you cold should you seek out Factory Girl this week over the mighty 300. This is a self important, fictionally enhanced tale of Edie Sedgwick, troubled society girl extraordinaire who never quite made it big but whose claim to fame was being patronised by Andy Warhol.

Warhol's bloated and seedy world of the ‘Factory’ is a place that grates on the nerves very quickly. Whilst everything is effectively brought to life – you can virtually smell the flatulent drug haze – it doesn’t mean that it’s a place you’d want to hang out.
Sienna Miller makes an attractive Sedgwick and really throws herself into the role but it is to little avail. The sad fact is that it’s simply no fun watching a spoilt little rich girl self destructing in grand style however authentically it is portrayed. Whatever slight sympathy you might harbour for Sedgwick has a very short half-life as she along with just about everybody else here become tedious to watch before the film is half done.
So Miller proves she can deliver in a leading role and Guy Pearce makes a decent Warhol even though it could be anyone under the glasses and wig. Hayden ‘Skywalker’ Christensen plays Bob Dylan who gets into an awkward romantic situation with Sedgwick (although his character is not named because of legal wrangles from the Dylan estate).
Some may enjoy seeing a society ‘it girl’ poverty-stricken, drug-addicted and generally on the ropes but Factory Girl fails to win any hearts of minds and merely serves as a car crash spectacle.
What’s annoying is that the whole Factory scene must have been an insane coalition and could potentially have made a crazy film experience detailing the dangers of excess, fleeting celebrity and of course the life wrecking drug effects. Alas Factory Girl is a limping shallow exercise in boredom, which cannot be saved even by copious ‘real’ talking heads who expound their recollections of Edie Sedgwick over the end credits. Unfortunately for all concerned by that point it’s far too little, too late…
Give me the blood soaked glory of 300’s Spartan warfare over this arty self-obsessed claptrap any day.

Darkmatters rating system (out of 5):

Action ö - none to speak of
Laughs ö – none to speak of
Horror ö – none to speak of
Babes ööö – Sienna is hot but this movie isn't

Overall ö (rich girls have issues too!)

Darkmatters: H O M E

Sunshine - dark days are coming

"am checking this out tomorrow... hopes are high..."

check out the cool trailer here: http://www.apple.com/trailers/

Darkmatters: H O M E

Inland Empire - review

Inland Empire
Dir. David Lynch

Reviewed by Matt Adcock

Congratulations – you’re visa has been approved for a visit to the Inland Empire – it’s a place like none you’ve ever imagined, but for David Lynch fans it’s also home… Inland Empire is a slow (very slow at three hours!) trip through the sleazy underbelly of Hollywood – or is it?

How else did I describe this freakfest?

a. like having the devil rub his hard-on on the back of your neck
b. the mother of all Lynchisms
c. freak fiction of the highest quality
or
d. all of the above...

Find out by reading the full review here: http://www.frankthemonkey.com

Darkmatters: H O M E