Review - Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance

Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance (12a)

Dir. Mark Nevaldine & Brian Taylor

“This thing... There's got no conscience, just hunger. The Rider's gonna come out. And when he does, he'll destroy whoever's got it coming.”

Not much can prepare you for this crazy follow up to 2007's ‘Ghost Rider’ (which wasn’t much cop but made a respectable $237,702,59 worldwide). Nicolas Cage must be as surprised as anyone to get the chance to return as Marvel’s darkest hero - Johnny Blaze – a guy possessed by a flame headed demonic entity called ‘The Rider’.

So Ghost Rider: Spirit of Vengeance is a kind of reboot of the franchise, bringing in the hit directors of the Crank movies and looking to bring some more frenetic, darker action to the big screen, this time in really unnecessary 3D.

"MANIC CAGE ALERT!!"

Plotwise we’re in Eastern Europe where it seems that the devil going under the name Rourke (Ciarán Hinds) is up to no good and trying to trade in his aging body for a younger model. The boy who is the dark lord’s target is his son Danny (Fergus Riordan) whose mother Nadya (Violante Placido) is doing all she can to keep him away from his evil dad.

Also on hand are a renegade monk named Moreau (Idris Elba) who is also trying to save the boy and badass gunslinger Corrigan (Johnny Whitworth) who sides with the devil to try and obtain the boy for him.

Cue a loud, silly, good-looking adventure – shot through with jump cut cinematography and random action sequences. Sure it’s flashy stuff but it doesn’t make much sense or engage very much. The best thing about it is the manic energy of Cage who hasn’t been this mental on camera since his twitch-em-up Wicker Man performance.

There are a couple of memorable scenes including a fun road based vehicle attack / chase and a spiritually charged communion where Johnny Blaze tries to save his cursed soul. Corrigan is briefly bumped up to be a super baddie who can corrupt anything he touches which makes eating tricky as his food crumbles to mouldy dust before it gets to his mouth (apart from an indestructible Twinky).

"If the Twisted Metal film isn't better than Ghost Rider 2 - it will be a crime!"

Spirit of Vengeance really isn’t a classic addition to the superhero cannon and is unlikely to be fondly remembered by many – it’s a quick stupid blast of dark tinged action with a license for Cage to go absolutely nuts in his patented overacting masterclass.

Out of a potential 5 you have to go with a Darkmatters:

öö

2 – Odd and manic doesn't equal great, anyway you look at it!?

Awesomeness öö – Cage is so far OTT it almost rocks

Laughs ööö – the acting is funny

Horror ööö – vaguely demonic goings on aren't pretty

Babes ööö – Violante Placido is hot

Spiritual Enlightenment ööö – redemption theme figures hard

"But maybe never again..."

The UK Gaming Landscape Changes in hours... PSVITA

The PS VITA hits UK on 22.02.12

PlayStation Vita Midnight Opening is TONIGHT!!



The Oxford Street GAME Store will be opening at 00.01 Wednesday, 22nd February to officially launch SONY's new handheld.



Those who brave the London night will be the first to own the PS Vita hours before anyone else, but as an extra bonus, every customer will also receive a £5 PSN voucher code.



But that's not all. SONY will be on hand and are promising a memorable night for all in attendance. VITA buyers will get the chance to go head-to-head with fellow gamers with some special PS Vita challenges, with prizes including GAME PSN vouchers, t-shirts and more...

"Ami Ledger... should be Ami Ledgend!"

There's also an exclusive meet and greet with WipEout 2048 developer Karl Jones, who will be signing copies of this highly-anticipated launch game. Cosplay girl Ami Ledger will also be in attendance for meeting, greeting and signing!



As a special bonus, the first 100 customers in the queue will receive tickets to an EXCLUSIVE after-party at the PS Vita Rooms, located just around the corner on Newman Street.



My world may seem the same as yours...

But it's not!

If the PS VITA was a woman... ?

Darkmatters Review: The Woman In Black

The Woman in Black (12)

Dir. James Watkins

Reviewed by Matt Adcock

Beware young Harry Potter fans – the boy who lived now finds himself in much darker territory… Daniel Radcliffe does his best ‘grown up’ face starring as noobie lawyer Arthur Kripps. His life has not been a happy one - his wife died in childbirth and his son is prone to doing sad drawings of them, but things can only pick up right?

Things don’t pick up, in fact they get very creepy and generally a bit grim when Kripps is dispatched to a remote northern village to sort out the paperwork of a deceased widow who has left a huge gothic mansion… The locals aren’t a friendly bunch – as it seems they are haunted by a spectral ghostly ‘Woman in Black’ has been appearing. This woman shaped ghoul is an omen of doom and when she is seen a child dies in the village…

"The Jehovah's Witness got cross at not being let in"

Director James ‘Eden Lake’ Watkins goes for the tried and tested ‘jump scene every 8 minutes’ formula with his adaptation of Susan Hill's best selling horror mystery novel. You really can set your watch by the ‘BOO’ moments as every opportunity to have ghostly images appear in the corner of shot, in mirrors, through grimy windows etc are taken. It’s certainly a decent effort at making you jump, wince and think ‘come on Harry – can’t you just use a spell to sort out this malicious old hag’. The film also walks a fine line of keeping within the crowd friendly 12 certificate (the last time The Woman in Black was made in 1989 it worked with a 15 cert).

Radcliffe does OK in the lead role, but most of the time he just has to look a bit mystified and / or scared. The rest of the cast are decent enough too and the special effects work well. The main ‘haunted house’ is a masterpiece of spook-em-up design and comes with the most sinister selection of evil looking toys ever to be assembled in one place.

"he who shall not be named..."

Yes The Woman in Black is absolutely chock full of horror movie genre clichés but they are thrown at the screen with such force that you can happily suspend your disbelief and lap up the screaming banshee wails, the terrified yelps and the whimpering that will be coming at you in ‘surround sound’ – mostly from the various young Harry Potter fans who have never witnessed a real horror movie before!?

Out of a potential 5 you have to go with a Darkmatters:

ööö

3 – Darkness and creepiness by the book

Awesomeness ööö – Potter 2.0

Laughs ö – not funny

Horror ööö – some mildly ghastly bits

Babes ö – not really

Spiritual Enlightenment öö – some spirits are not to be trusted!?

Darkmatters Review: Chronicle

Chronicle (12)

Dir. Josh Trank

Reviewed by Matt Adcock

“Telekinesis: The ability to move, lift, vibrate (that's my favourite), spin, bend, break or impact objects through the direct influence of mental power or other non-physical means."

You want to see some ‘direct influence’? Go and see Chronicle, this is a pitch perfect tale of three high school kids who acquire telekinetic superpowers from a strange possibly alien artefact. So what are these young guys going to do with the power to move things, fly and attack people just with their minds?

At first the three lead characters – troubled Andrew (Dane DeHaan), his nice-but-dim cousin Matt (Alex Russell), and slick Steve (Michael B. Jordan) — go out and have fun with their powers. Pranking shoppers, pulling off jaw-dropping talent show routines, checking out girls’ underwear, playing football in the clouds (a truly grin inducing sequence) – you know, just the average lads kind of stuff. But before you can say ‘with great power comes great responsibility’ at least one of the group is exploring his dark side which sets up the most thrilling super-heroic battle climax to grace the big screen in years.

"Super powered snacking"

Chronicle is a great film, it deconstructs the standard super hero genre in a similar way to the excellent Kick Ass or Super did and manages to play it both for laughs and packs a darker undercurrent. My teenage son loved it and proclaimed it to be ‘awesome’ which is high praise for a relatively low ($15m) budget film.

Some might not like the idea of Chronicle being a ‘found footage’ flick – most of the shots are taken from the hand held camera Andrew carries around with him. It works though and adds a fun element of effectively capturing the changing moods of the characters. First time director Trank uses the hand held cinematic device to good effect, especially when Andrew causes the camera to float using his powers. There is also some social commentary on the very reasons people choose to record what they do.

"you'll believe nerds can fly"

Chronicle is a refreshing blast of teen angst channelled through super-powered urban destruction – this is a ‘must see’ film for anyone who enjoys superhero flicks and it even leaves the door open for what would be a welcome follow up.

"cheap forks don't even puncture the flesh"

Chronicle will rock you and leave you breathless – highly recommended viewing.

Out of a potential 5 you have to go with a Darkmatters:

ööööö

5 – Dark, unsettling and brilliant!!

Awesomeness ööööö – some fantastic scenes you'll never forget

Laughs ööö – laugh out loud in places (boys will be boys)

Horror ööö – grim moments for a 12

Babes öö – not really babetastic

Spiritual Enlightenment öö – revenge = right?

Darkmatters Review: Man On A Ledge

Man On A Ledge (12)

Dir. Asger Leth

Reviewed by Matt Adcock

So there’s a man right – we’ll call him Nick (Sam Worthington looking for all the world like a B-movie version of Mel Gibson). Nick is a good guy, an ex-cop who is on the run as a fugitive because he was set up by an evil property magnate - David Englander (a eye wateringly OTT Ed Harris).

And then there’s this ledge right… No, not a ‘legend’ like Ryan Gosling in Drive but an actual ledge as in the thin decorative element that runs around the edge of a Manhattan hotel.

Put the man and the ledge together – throw in a sexy police psychiatrist named Lydia (Elizabeth Banks), an even sexier thief named Angie (Genesis Rodriguez) – and watch the ensuing negotiation thriller unfold.

"sexy thief"

"sexy cop"

Man on a Ledge isn’t a terrible film but it is an entirely disposable one.

I saw this in a double bill with Chronicle and of the two there is only one that I really remember all that much about… and it wasn’t the one with the ledge in it. So if you have some time to kill and fancy seeing an innocent man using every cliché in the book to try and clear his name – Man on a Ledge could be just for you. And if the ledge doesn’t get a best supporting actor nod it will only prove that the Academy always overlook talented by non-sentient props (as proved by Alec Baldwin in 2003 for ‘The Cooler’).

Be sure to look out for the potential sequel – 'Man Not On A Ledge Anymore'!

Out of a potential 5 you have to go with a Darkmatters:

ööö

3 – fear the ledge (or don't bother)

Drive vs Star Wars trailer = awesome

This is a work of absolute genius...

The Wholly Family

Terry Gilliam's new short film masterpiece The Wholly Family - can be viewed here on Darkmatters for a low price...

StarHawk (PS3 Exclusive) Beta

StarHawk (PS3 Exclusive) Beta

Developed / Produced by Santa Monica Studios / Lightbox Interactive

Reviewed by Matt Adcock

Step this way gamers to experience intense frenetic combat on foot, in vehicles and in the air… StarHawk is a new type of shooter packing a wonderful gameplay system called "Build & Battle."

If you’ve ever enjoyed shooting stuff online and / or building strategic defenses StarHawk will be your new best friend! I’ve been playing the Beta now for a couple of weeks and it is fast becoming a way of life!! The balance of power is swayed by the tactical advantage of picking from an arsenal of weapons, vehicles, and fortifications, violently delivered from an orbiting drop ship to help turn the tide of battle.

There is a very special feeling engaging in epic 32 player online battles where the maps dynamically change depending completely on each player’s strategy. Working online in a team and playing with friends is the very definition of ‘Awesome’.

In the Beta there are 2 game modes available - Capture the Flag and Team Deathmatch. If you played WarHawk, the basics of running / driving around and fighting aren’t a million miles away – flying has changed a bit due to the fact that the ‘Hawks’ in StarHawk can stomp around as Mechs as well as fly like F11’s. Jetpacks are available from the start too, in fact there’s tons here and the Beta doesn’t even give you everything the full game will...

StarHawk differs from WarHawk mostly though because of the fact that you can ‘build’ stuff – like hangers to launch Hawks from, garages to provide cars, bases which have heavy weaponry in them, sniper towers, walls, turrets and manned gun emplacements – think fast moving RTS game and you’ll get the idea!?. This strategic element brings a whole new way to play to the combat genre – it might sound mad or daunting but it works – and after a couple of games you’ll think Call of Duty is horribly limited because you can’t build stuff to sway the fight.

"dammit this bogey's all over me"

StarHawk is incredibly addictive and hits that sweet ‘one more go’ factor that can lead to whole nights being eaten up before you know what happened. Oh and the full game will have a complete single player campaign too (unlike WarHawk).

"ouch!"

Hats off to the battle hungry dudes at Lightbox and Santa Monica studios – StarHawk is already a fantastic game even in Beta stage… I literally can’t wait for it hit the shops – online battlers need to play this game, Xbox 360 owners should seriously consider getting a PS3 for this (and maybe Twisted Metal) in 2012.

Bring it!!

"If StarHawk was a girl... would probably be Amber Heard!"

Chronicle - first 'must see' film of 2012

Chronicle 

Matt Adcock is excited...

Sometimes a film sneaks up on you and when you see the trailer you think - 'oh yes!' - that film for me this week was Chronicle. I'd seen and loved the trailer (below) but didn't realise quite how close to release it was... So it will be this week's film and with 5 star reviews already hitting with quotes like "For all the blockbusters due out over the spring and summer – many of which cost anywhere north of $100million – Chronicle is the movie they have to beat. It truly is that good." from Den of Geek (check their review here).



Looks like I'm going to have to finally check out THE KILL POINT which was the TV show that Chronicle director Josh Trank made...

Melancholia Review

Melancholia (15)

Dir. Lars Von Trier

Reviewed by Matt Adcock

“Hold my hand. Close your eyes.”

Lars Von Trier follows up his shocking, hit and miss ‘AntiChrist’ with an epic of human emotion – wrapped in fantasy sci-fi spectacle… The opening is an incredible, mind frazzling collage of slow-motion scenes which perfectly set the apocalyptic tone for the whole film. There are images that will stay with you forever and show the director is at the height of his ‘art’…

Melancholia is a lavish and fascinating dive into the deep waters of emotion and feelings that fluctuate between us. It is peppered with superb lines such as my favourite (working in communications):

“What education is perfect for Public Relations? Why, none at all of course!!”

Newly wed bride Justine (Kirsten Dunst – looking better than ever in a low cut wedding dress) is a force of nature in the lead role. She is ably backed up by the rest of the cast who include her sister, Claire (Charlotte Gainsbourg) and her new husband Michael (Alexander Skarsgård). There are key smaller roles also for Kiefer Sutherland (in a refreshing non-action part) as her brother in law who finances the massively expensive wedding reception of the first section. Random sex and strained relationships ensue.

"Who represents which planet?"

There is something about seeing a planet colliding with earth to the prelude to Richard Wagner's ‘Tristan and Isolde,’ that goes beyond poetic, referencing and imbues a sense of desolation and mood beyond the pop culture popular painting inspirations that many have criticised the film for.

Melancholia is split into two ‘parts’ which have the twin themes of Justine’s manic depressive behaviour and the coming of the a newly discovered planet which may or may not actually fulfil the portending dreams of planetary collusion…

Dunst does trauma well and is aided by a filmmaker whose vision is so strong that it sucks you into his wake kicking and screaming as witnessing doom and gloom never having looked so good. Packed with symbolism the cross over between Justine and Claire as their personas become twisted together (possibly by the gravitation pull of the new planet – named Melancholia) is a trip into the very essence of extinction – both of body and mind. Are we ready for it? Will we lie naked and bathe in the radiance of our undoing as Dunst does? Is there hope or are we tied into the seemingly random dance of death between our planet and another?

Watching the planet Melancholia approaching Earth from Trier’s nihilistic world view is extremely powerful and something which , as a Christian, was deeply thought provoking. Is the director really saying that life isn’t worth living? Melancholia is a great companion piece to view with The Tree of Life which delves into similar metaphysical territory and leaves you with very differing emotions.

Melancholia isn’t a film for anyone looking for a happy ending – this is the end of the world… The question is – how will you deal with it? It looks amazing whatever your thinking on the impending Armageddon – especially in high definition.

Out of a potential 5 you have to go with a Darkmatters:

ööööö

5 – Life ends... in some fine style!

"Kirsten Dunst - lovely"

Darkmatters Review: The Descendants

The Descendants (15) 

Dir. Alexander Payne

Reviewed by Matt Adcock

Here’s a thing – how can a wistful film about the infidelity and death of a beloved wife be uplifting and life affirming in the midst of the massive grief, hurt and suffering of the main character? It takes a very special actor to pull of such a role and luckily for The Descendants, George Clooney brings his ‘A’ game and completely nails the lead as Matt King.

The Descendants is a free wheeling family drama set on the idyllic Hawaiian islands – and the scenery plays a key part to the feel of the film. The pacing is leisurely and laid back, which mirrors the pace of life on the islands and as well as Clooney delivering a potentially career best performance, the rest of the cast are great too.

"Happy families?"

The plot is anything but feel good – this is an intense trip into the conflicting emotions, as Matt and his two daughters Alexandra (the awesome Shailene Woodley) and Scottie (Amara Miller) have to deal with the loss of their wife/mother. On paper it sounds depressing and a hard slog of a watch, so it is an incredible achievement that Director Alexander Payne has crafted an amazing film that balances the depths of misery with a positive energy of life having to go on.

I haven’t seen bereavement and grief handled so well on the big screen for a long time, the King family is one that you will get to appreciate and root for in their time of crisis – and you’ll feel both drained and moved by the time the end credits roll. A little light entertainment is provided in Alexandra’s nice-but-dim boyfriend Sid (Nick Krause) who is used to great comic effect throughout. 

"Just add some cranky grandparents..."

One point though – if you absolutely hate Hawaiian music then The Descendants isn’t the movie for you and it embraces the island soundtrack every bit as much as it relishes in the paradise looks of the place. Clooney's Matt King is a deep character – he shows flaws and regret for all to see and his broken relationships his daughters is as honest and painful as anything committed to screen.

The Descendants takes you to a dark time in the lives of a family already coming apart at the seams, It’s a trip worth taking and one to savour – just don’t expect it to wash over you without your soul being engaged.

Out of a potential 5 you have to go with a Darkmatters:

öööö1/2

4.5 – family values

Awesomeness ööö – everything just 'works'

Laughs ööö – some good funnies (helps make the pain bearable)

Horror ööö – emotional scars possible

Babes ööö – Shailene Woodley is one to watch!

Spiritual Enlightenment öö – l.i.v.e.g.o.e.s.o.n

Darkmatters Review Underworld: Awakening

Underworld: Awakening (18)

Dir. Måns Mårlind and Björn Stein

Reviewed by Matt Adcock

“ I am a Death Dealer, sworn to destroy those known as the Lycans. Our war has waged for centuries, unseen by human eyes. But all that is about to change... again.”

Underworld: Awakening is the fourth film in the Underworld franchise – the fun, schlocky action packed series where we humans are caught in the crossfire of an ancient battle between vampires and were-wolves (Lycans). This time however, the human contingent are taking the fight back to the fantasy beasties with the aim of wiping them out – except all might not be what it seems and it will fall to one vampire ‘Death Dealer’ to fight her way to the truth.

"bang!"

The Death Dealer in question is the gorgeous Selene (Kate Beckinsale) who after 12 years imprisoned in frozen containment by the humans, bursts back into the war clad in her iconic shiny lycra catsuit, packing her trademark two handguns. Beckinsale looks absolutely amazing - squeezing convincingly back into her skin-tight outfit as if she hadn’t ever skipped the last film Underworld: Rise of the Lycans to take time out to have children.

Underworld: Awakening is a pitch perfect blast of over-the-top action, which sets the bar for impressive the action scenes in 2012. Watching Selene stylishly shoot, stab, punch, kick and snap the necks of all who oppose her is a fantasy action fans dream and man, she looks great kicking ass, oozing danger and sexual overload in a eye-watering combination.

"Selene looking to have quiet word with the Lycans"

Directors Måns Mårlind and Björn Stein do a great job of rocking the implausible plot which sees Selene finding that whilst she’s been frozen, a new hybrid vampire/lycan child named Eve has been genetically created from her and her lover’s DNA. Eve (India Eisley) sees Selene as her ‘mother’ and the two can see things through each other’s eyes. But you don’t really need to worry too much about the plot – it all basically serves to connect a series of intense action set pieces. Many critics have dismissed Awakening but judging from the enthusiastic audience reaction in the screening I caught this in (and the fact that it has made over $25million in it’s opening weekend) there seems to be a real ‘thirst’ for this gothic adventure shot through with Matrix-alike stylistic trappings.

If you’re looking for a fangtastic Friday night action blast – Underworld: Awakening is an adrenalin shot of awesome that will hit the spot.

Out of a potential 5 you have to go with a Darkmatters:

öööö

4 – Death dealing is back and looking better than ever

Awesomeness öööö – jaw dropping action, eye popping costumes

Laughs öö – occasional hammy lines raise smiles

Horror öööö  – earns the 18 certificate with some brutal kills

Babes öööö – Selene is super watchable in rubber / leather outfit

Spiritual Enlightenment öö – won't tear your soul apart

For the trailer and more images click here

"India Eisley - co-star"

Darkmatters Review: Shark Night 3D

Shark Night 3D (15)

Dir. David R. Ellis

Reviewed by Matt Adcock

Just when you thought is was safe to go back in the cool clear blu(ray) water… along comes a trashy Jaws rip-off which apes the success of the fun horror chomp-em-up Piranha 3D…

"ready for my close up!"

So first things first – Shark Night 3D might have sharks and be in 3D - as long as you’ve got a 3D TV, but most of it isn’t at night. But then I guess Shark mild afternoon doesn’t really have the same ring to it.

Directed David Ellis who has form for nastily offing teens from both Final Destination 2 and The Final Destination gives it a fair go bringing in not just big toothy sharks but also monsters of the human kind who are in league with them!?

"it's behind you!?"

The shark bait is an obligatory selection of hot looking college kids led by the foxy blonde bikini wearer Sara Palski (Sara Paxton) and her entourage including horny dudes, like repressed Nick (Dustin Milligan) and eye candy girls like Beth (Katherine McPhee). You can play horror bingo all the way through – stupid decisions, gratuitous posing and general dimness ‘I’ll take this mortally wounded pal across shark-infested waters on a waterski – what could possibly go wrong?’

The Louisiana setting works well and gives the film a slightly gothic edge – one that is helped no end by the film's human villains, a gruesome twosome of dodgy but cute Dennis (Chris Carmack) and his oddball hillbilly pal Carl (Jimmy Lee Jr.), who packs a set of sharpened teeth which could rival the sharks!?

"the girls - only picked for their brains"

The CGI shark are actually pretty cool, backed up with some nice robot efforts too but they are criminally under used. They do get some fun moments such as jumping out of the water to munch on passing teens and smashing through protective cages etc. but there was scope for more fish action...

Out of a potential 5 you have to go with a Darkmatters:

ööö

3 (pure trash schlock of the fun kind)

"miss Paxton minus the sharks"

UNDERWORLD: AWAKENING DAY

Underworld: Awakening hits the UK

Matt Adcock

Yep it's the potential movie event of 2012!?

"remember Selene from Underworld?"

Underworld: Awakening brings a stunning new dimension to the epic battle between Vampires and Lycans, as the first film in the franchise to shoot in 3D. Kate Beckinsale, star of the first two films, returns in her lead role as the vampire warrior-ess Selene, who escapes imprisonment to find herself in a world where humans have discovered the existence of both Vampire and Lycan clans, and are conducting an all-out war to eradicate both immortal species.

"still shooting by the looks of things"

Can it really be 9 years since the first film? And more importantly - can the 4th entry in the series be any good?

Here's a snippet of an early review:

 "As a fan of the franchise, Underworld: Awakening feels like the movie I've been waiting for ever since the first one was released in 2003. Beckinsale has never been better, the story and action finally blends together a bit more smoothly, and incorporating humans into the Vampire/Lycan war breathes a new life into the series." thehorrorchick (read the full review here: Dread Central).

"say goodbye"

Full Darkmatters review this weekend...

Link to: Kate Beckinsale in a 'who has the best cinematic catsuit' stand off!?

Link to Darkmatters review of  UNDERWORLD: EVOLUTION

Adele - bigger than Call of Duty (in 2011)

"headshot"

Darkmatters marvels at just how large Adele is... 

With 2 entries in the annual 'best selling' list and the overall number 1 position - Adele can be crowned as 'queen of sales 2011'... Nothing could compete with her, even the mighty Modern Warfare 3 met its match!?

Here's the official entertainment chart for 2011

2011 ENTERTAINMENT - TOP 10

 1 - 21 - Adele - 3,924,985 - Album
 2 - Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3 - 2,814,609 - Game
 3 - Harry Potter &The Deathly Hallows – Part 1 - 2,532,551 - Video
 4 - FIFA 12 - 2,193,302 - Game
 5 - Harry Potter & The Deathly Hallows – Part 2 - 2,147,606 - Video
 6 - The Inbetweeners Movie - 2,074,652 - Video
 7 - The King’s Speech - 1,882,175 - Video
 8 - Christmas - Michael Buble - 1,349,195 - Album
 9 - Doo-Wops & Hooligans - Bruno Mars - 1,264,763 - Album
 10 - 19 - Adele - 1,264,273 - Album

Full top 40 chart can be found HERE

"next year look out for the Adele being a playable character in COD Black Ops 2"

Darkmatters Review: War Horse

War Horse (12a)

Dir. Steven Spielberg

Reviewed by Matt Adcock

Hello horse fans, you join us for the first marathon World War One big screen steeplechase - the going is good to firm but bogged down with far too many soggy areas…

Soft-hearted billionaire director Spielberg turns this children’s novel / hit play into a long-winded film and leisurely crafts a lavish but oddly pedestrian ode to possibly the bravest equine beastie ever.

Spielberg's film are mostly viewed as cinematic phenomena but War Horse is a bit of a hard sell after it has been worked up with plenty of sentimentality by the likes of Richard ‘Four Weddings’ Curtis. Yes the cinematography is gorgeous and there are a couple of exciting scenes including a stunning Calvary charge thanks to the WWI setting but my son (who’d read the book and was keen to see the film) actually fell asleep about half way through!?

"let slip the erm, horses of war?"

So why is War Horse slightly lame rather than the epic thoroughbred it could (should?) have been? It’s certainly not the fault of the lead horse ‘Joey’ – you’d be hard pressed to find a nobler looking or engaging horse – if they gave Oscars to animals he’s be a dead cert to bag it... Nor really can the blame for the dramatic flatness be totally shouldered by the competent cast. What is missing here is the ability of the film to actually connect and make you care more than mildly about anything you’re witnessing.

Joey’s odyssey from humble farm beginnings through to messianic wartime icon certainly had the potential to send shivers down the viewers spines and grab their imaginations, so it’s hard to explain quite why the overall reaction isn’t better. I found the best scene to be the no-man's-land sequence where a British and a German soldier work together to free Joey from his barbed wire / near death predicament. It really stands out because it feels less ‘forced’ than the most of the other scenes. Eventually the clunky plot limps along to the very Hollywood conclusion, which leaves those audience members who are still awake with a lump in their throats and probably a newfound desire to buy a pony.

This War Horse should have been a cinematic thoroughbred but it falls short in a blub of sentimentality. Overall it’s decent enough but not a classic, maybe Spielberg’s forthcoming Robopocalypse will deliver more?

Out of a potential 5 you have to go with a Darkmatters:

ööö

3 (lovely looking horsey droppings)

Awesomeness ööö – Cavalry charge is the definition of awesome
Laughs öö – Not very funny
Horror öö – Moments of grimness but mostly bland
Babes ö – Horsey women aren't my cup of tea
Spiritual Enlightenment öö - A boy, a horse, an implausible plotline... Ahhh...

"nowhere is safe from foot sniffing horses"

Darkmatters Review: Colombiana

Colombiana (15)

Dir. Olivier Megaton

Reviewed by Matt Adcock

There’s something undeniably cool about having a smokin hot female assassin be an unstoppable killing machine – and Zoe Saldana delivers a great performance in the lead role of Cataleya, a female with a killer body and vengeance on her mind. We meet Cataleya back when she’s just nine, bad men come to her house and kill her parents – she flees and manages to get to the U.S. Embassy where she is given a passport in exchange for a memory card that which holds the data which the baddies want.

The action then jumps from Colombia to Chicago when Cataleya has grown up and honed her skills to become a walking death dealer. approaches Her ‘hits’ are very nicely staged – from getting herself locked up in the same cellblock as a target through to literally sending a baddie to ‘sleep with the fishes’ – this girl rocks some slick assassin moves and leaves a lipstick drawn picture of an Amazonian orchid (also called Cataleya) on the target’s chests.

"how to make an entrance!?"

Of course it isn’t long before her under cover operations draw unwanted attention and she has to move to the end game of finally getting revenge for her parents deaths. Cue corrupt CIA and dogged policeman tracking her down for different reasons plus mob cartel heavies coming and wiping out even her extended family – just we’re fully on her side when she dispatches them in the climactic assault on the big bosses lair.

Oliver Megaton (love his surname) brings the requisite frantic pace and jump cut style of filming, taking every chance to show off Saldana’s perfect butt in HD. This is a trashy, flashy movie that won’t change your world but will entertain greatly.

Colombiana delivers a good time of high-octane thrills and spills. It’s not quite up there with Leon in terms of Besson’s efforts but is a lot of violent escapist fun.

Out of a potential 5 you have to go with a Darkmatters:

ööö1/2 

3.5 - sexy and deadly (great combination)

"Zoe Saldana... window dressing!?"

Darkmatters Review: The Iron Lady

The Iron Lady (12)

Dir. Phyllida Lloyd

Reviewed by Matt Adcock

This isn’t actually an ambitious sequel to animated sci-fi flick The Iron Giant, no this is an equally far fetched tale of how a female life form somehow assimilated the position of utmost political power in the UK.

Yes, whatever your political alliance, the name ‘Margaret Thatcher’ will undoubtedly resonate deep feelings within anyone who lived through her reign of terror from 4 May 1979 – 28 November 1990. Played incredibly here by Meryl Streep – who must surely by up for serious award nominations for this role – the film depicts the titular ‘Iron Lady’ in her confused and unstable elderly years. As she struggles to come to terms with the loss of her husband Denis (Jim Broadbent), with whom she still talks and interacts even though he’s no more than a figment of her imagination. This gives the filmmakers the plot device to run through a highlight reel of Thatcher’s ‘greatest hits’ – jumping between the high profile elements of her time in power including the miners strike, the Falklands war and the poll tax riots.

The most interesting areas are the quick dip into the early years of how young Margaret managed to blast her way through the many barriers of gender and class to make her way into the male-dominated world. The film is also touching in the love story of her and Denis and the price she had to pay for her single minded pursuit of power.

"We are the champions..."

Unfortunately, the overall film is lumpy, schmaltzy and liable to test your viewing endurance even with Streep’s powerhouse performance. Yes Thatcher is and was an extraordinary and complex woman but The Iron Lady leads viewers very firmly (and mostly overly sympathetically) through her career.

Supporting cast such as Olivia Colman, who plays Maggie’s daughter Carol do well with their limited screen time and the special effects that bring about the aging process as scarily effective (possibly overly so as there are not many people who want to spend cash to stare at strange wrinkled synthetic elderly make up effects for almost two hours).

The Iron Lady really might be Streep’s finest-ever performance, but it unfortunately just isn’t enough to make up for the pedestrian filmmaking and propaganda-ish spoon-feeding of very selected highlights.

Tory boys and their ladies may lap up the blue rinse flashbacks with a “rah rah” and a wave of their ‘I heart Maggie’ flags. Fans of quality films however are likely to be unconvinced and unimpressed by this docile effort – Streep’s performance deserves to be in a much better film!

Out of a potential 5 you have to go with a Darkmatters:

öö1/2

2.5 – weak overall but merit for Streep's Iron grip!

Awesomeness öö – nothing a but a good time for the Tory Right

Laughs öö – not meant to be funny but sometimes it is

Horror öö – if wrinkles freak you out then be afraid

Babes ö – not happening

Spiritual Enlightenment öö – blues for the soul

Trailer:

Second Opinion:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/film/2012/jan/08/the-iron-lady-review